Help in understanding

In most households last week there was likely some form of discussion related to the devastating 7.0-magnitude earthquake that hit Haiti on Jan. 12. The television was probably on with images of the death and destruction in full view. Family members have likely been searching for information on the Internet and come across some disturbing videos and photos of the event and aftermath of a catastrophic event that has pitted a nation of people into an unbearable situation.

For adults the news that the death toll from this earthquake may exceed 100,000 is almost incomprehensible. Seeing the images of bodies of people of every age in the roads and being pulled from the rubble is hard to comprehend. As we sit in the comfort of our homes with access to running water, electricity, communication, food, etc. it is difficult to imagine that on the same earth that we all share there are so many people who have absolutely nothing.

If we as adults feel helpless in this situation, imagine how it feels for a child who is trying to comprehend what it is all about. World Vision Canada noted there are questions children will have like: Could this happen to me? What's going to happen to the children? Can I do anything to help the children I see on TV?

Following are eight suggestions World Vision recommends as ways to make a tough job a bit easier:

1. Start by listening. ?Find out what your kids already know. You can then respond in an age-appropriate way. The aim is not to worry them with the devastating details, but to protect them from misinformation they may have heard from friends or disturbing images they may have seen on television.

2. Provide clear, simple answers. ?Limit your answer to the question asked and use simple language.

3. If you don't know the answer, admit it. If your child asks a question that you can't answer, tell them so, and then do some research to try and help them sort it out. If they ask "Why did this have to happen?" don't be afraid to say "I don't know." If you are part of a faith community, the reassurance offered there can be invaluable in helping your child sort through the awful truth that awful things happen.

4. Follow media reports or online updates privately. ?Young children in particular are easily traumatized, and seeing or hearing about the horrifying details of the quake are more than they can cope with. Adults, too, should ensure they are dealing with their own emotions by talking to others, so they can continue to respond well to their children's needs.

5. Concentrate on making them feel safe.? When tragedies occur, children wonder if the same event could happen in their hometown. If it was an act of nature that could not be repeated in your area, tell children that. Placing themselves in the situations of victims is not all bad-it is a sign of empathy, an essential life skill, but watch for signs of excessive worrying.

6. Give children creative outlets. ?Some children may not be prepared to speak about what they have heard, but may find drawing or other creative activities helpful to deal with their emotions and stress. Their drawings can be helpful starting points for conversation.

7. Model involvement and compassion. ?Tell your child that, as a family, you will be helping the people in Haiti by giving a donation to a reputable charity.

8. Give your child a chance to be involved. ?Being involved in the solution will help relieve some of their anxiety. Invite them to contribute to the family's gift by giving something out of their piggy bank.